Today was major house cleaning day. That meant shampooing the carpets, mainly the one in what was Trevor's room. That meant I had to see all his empty stuff especially his emtpy wheelchair. I had to keep moving it out of the way. Seeing it was hard. I know it's empty because he doesn't need it any more. He's walking and free in Heaven, but he's not here and I miss him. But, just when I was feeling at my worst, I checked email and there was an email from the boy (J.) I looked after on Saturday. He was just saying hi from school. It made me laugh. God knew that I needed a silly boy in my life right now. Just like after Kayda died, God knew I needed a snuggle boy, not a snuggle girl. Even if I don't take care of J. for another couple of weeks at least I know there's a silly boy out there somewhere that I can get to know.
I phoned the social worker today and asked him to send me more kids for respite. They're probably not used to people begging to be put to work. So far the only people I know of are all boys.
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Isn't it neat the way God works. So glad J is in your life. He just sounds like what you need right now. You are good with boys.
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